Creating Focus Takes Some Preliminary Work

I had my first Breakthrough Focus Coaching sessions yesterday with the members of my test group of clients.

I think I learned as much or more than they did and everyone who comes after them into this coaching program will be reaping tremendous benefits. I’m so glad I created this test group so that I can learn even greater insights into helping business leaders create laster like focus.

Here is what I learned:

1) In order to create focus and be able to remain focused with limited distractions you first have to decide what to focus on. That may seem rather elementary but its not.  Four of the six coaching sessions I had yesterday dealth with the issue of identifying priorities.

2) There are truly fewer priorities than people originally believe there are.

3) Once #2 is realized, the distractions fade away and there are true priorities to focus on.

Here’s an example of a discussion I had:

CLIENT: I’ve been listening to your focused relaxation/meditation recordings but its really not working yet. I have so many things I need to focus on and I seem to bounce around and I haven’t been able to move forward.

SKIP: OK, I’m assuming some of those things are personal things and some of those things are for your business right, and they are all clustered together, right

CLIENT: Right.

SKIP: OK, let’s play a game. The game will be divided into two sections, business and personal. We’ll start with business first. Answer this question with the first thing that comes to your mind, OK.

CLIENT: OK

SKIP: What is MOST important you in your business at this moment in time?

CLIENT: I need to establish a marketing plan so that I can have a consistent road map to follow to move my business forward.

SKIP: Great, what else is MOST important to you in your busienss at this moment in time?

CLIENT: To get 1-2 new clients as soon as possible.

SKIP: Great, what else is MOST important to you in your busienss at this moment in time?

CLIENT: Being happy and knowing that I’m making a difference with the work I do.

SKIP: Great, what else is MOST important to you in your busienss at this moment in time?

CLIENT: Umm, Umm, that’s about it, I think.

SKIP: Great, let’s shift gears now, What is MOST important to you in your personal life at this moment in time?

CLIENT: To improve my health and fitness.

SKIP: Great, what else is MOST important to you in your personal life at this moment in time?

CLIENT: To travel more, but I really can’t do that because of my wife’s job and scheduling, so that has to be put on the back burner for now.

SKIP: Great, What else is MOST important to you in your personal life at this moment in time?

CLIENT: Umm, I think that’s about it.

SKIP: Ok, so let me get this straight. All the things you have running around your mind, all the priorities you have to focus on really can be streamlined to these three activities and one feeling?

CLIENT: That’s it.

SKIP: So, do you think it will now be easy to move forward and focus on those three key areas of:
1) Creating a workable marketing plan for your business;
2) Acquiring 1-2 new clients;
3) Improving on your health and fitness

CLIENT: Yea, that’s easy.

We’ll see how he does when we reconnect in two weeks. I had similar discussions with three others yesterday.

Our mind likes to play tricks on us and make things more difficult than they really are.

Why?

Because we need to feel important and to feel important we need to believe we have a lot of things to deal with. So, we get caught up in that feeling of importance and telling ourselves and others we have so much to do and we spin our wheels doing things, instead of focusing on the ‘right things.’

One other issue a number of people were confusing the power focus objectives is the daily, day-to-day life things we have to deal with, cooking and eating meals, cleaning the house, doing laundry, paying the bills, etc. Those are not objectives those are just things we need to schedule into our lives so that we can be comfortable.

Do not fall into the trap of confusing household, business and personal chores with clear personal and business objectives.

I’ll keep you posted, we talk next to the group on Wednesday, July 11th and we’ll see how everyone is does with this new approach.

There has to be more to happiness than this

For the first time in at least 10 years I stopped at an Arby’s fast food restaurant the other day. It was the only option in site and I was between appointments. I actually found something decent and relatively healthy to eat, a chicken salad wrap. With it I got an iced tea.

On the cup from which I was drinking the iced tea was this quote:

“Happiness is only a curly fry away.”

I’m all for making it easy for us to be happy and I like curly fries as much as the next guy (I refrained from buying the value meal that included the curly fries though). Bringing happiness to someone through curly fries is okay, I guess. But I’d focus on something a little more healthy, personally fulfilling, and worldly.

Buy, hey, that’s just me!

Are You Asking the Right Questions to Create the Breakthrough Focus You Need?

One of the most important strategies I teach members of my Breakthrough FOCUS Coaching Program is how to use powerful and positive language to move forward.

On today’s teleconference call one member was having a challenge breaking through some old patterns of behavior. It turns out that his language pattern has been,
“Why can’t I stay on track and do what I need to do?” “Why do I always stop doing what I should be doing?”

These are very dis-empowering questions that put our focus in the wrong place. You mind is very powerful. So powerful that it will give you an answer to whatever question you ask of it. The challenge is we are asking the wrong questions most of the time.

This program member was stuck because he was caught in a loop of asking ‘why can’t I?” and his mind is giving him all the answers to why he can’t do things. If you turn that question around and ask “How can I” your mind will give you a slew of answers that you can act upon and no longer be focused on that stuck state.

This is so much more than just positive thinking, it is part of my Active Affirmations strategy that can help anyone breakthrough their unfocused and distracted state.

Give it a try and let me know how big a difference it makes.

Ain’t worth complaining about

Walked into a former prospect the other day. I asked him how it was going and got this very common response:

“I can’t complain and it wouldn’t do any good if I did, anyhow!”

I can’t imagine going through my day with that type of attitude. And, this guy owns a retail business. No wonder why revenue and
cash flow was at all time low when we met last winter. Doesn’t seem as though much has changed. Oh, well.

Making the Most of Your Time on the Road

I had a great business opportunity present itself today and so I had to make the most of it. The challenge was that it was about 50 miles away and I had to drive there and at $3.25 for a gallon of fuel, I needed to make the most of my drive. On short notice I didn’t have time to schedule other appointments around this appointment so I just did the best I could. I called three or four business contacts and tried to set up a meeting to no avail, so I just winged it. I was committed to not just driving there and back, so I did some drop-ins.

I stopped by three places on my way back that reinforced three business relationships that needed reinforcing, and so I thought it was a worthwhile 150 mile trip (these moves added maybe 25 miles to my journey). It was also a very enjoyable drive as it was a perfect day to be driving around with my top down, about 85 degrees, sunny but not too hot, my favorite type of day.

With gas prices as they are and your continue challenge in building your business in as little time as possible, be sure you are maximizing your time on the road. If you are in the area of a client or prospect and haven’t been in touch in a while, just stop by and say ‘hello.’ It will be appreciated.

Remembering Names a Key to Business Success - Got to Get Better, What About You?

Remembered the name of a potential prospect in a ‘get to know you meeting’ with whom I am going to have a follow up meeting in 7 days.

I should have done what I teach my clients to do and that is put myself in a focused mindset and tell myself “I will do whatever I need to, to remember the names of everyone I’m going to meet in this meeting.”

My mistake was assuming I was going to be meeting with just one person, not the entire leadership team in this meeting, and as such I went in ill-prepared for that part of the meeting, but still had a very productive meeting with a business I know I can help. 

I will do better next time, what about you?

Adjusting to Change, Is It Easier for a Cat Than a Human?

I’m an indoor cat, have been my whole life. So you would think that unlike humans, a change in where I live wouldn’t make that much of a difference to me. That couldn’t be farther from the truth, which is why our recent move was so intriguing for me to watch unfold.

We moved to a new home a few months ago and I like our new home. It was an easy change for me, surprisingly. I wish I could say the same for Skip he seemed to have trouble adjusting to the change of environment, more on that later.

Skip & Anne were worried that i’d have trouble adjusting to the move and the change in environment. They were concerned because of my previous move, when I originally moved in with them last year. That move was traumatic, this move was a piece of cake. Let’s take a look at the differences and see if you humans can learn something from how a cat adapted to a changing environment in two different situations.

First move - a big change:
1) I was leaving the family and home I had lived in for the first 6 years of my life to go to a completely new environment;
2) I did not know the people who had taken me in;
3) I did not know where I was going or where I was, my entire world was turned upside down;
4) I did not know why this move was being made, was I just being cast aside because I had done something wrong or was there a real reason for why I had to go to a new home?

all of the above created for me tremendous fear, uncertainty and self-doubt.

Second move - not such a big change:
1) I was moving with my family and so there were no changes in the faces or the function in the new home;
2) Except for a few new pieces of furniture all my surroundings remained the same. The couch, chairs and bed I regularly lay on were still there although configured a little differently in the living room;
3) My litter pan and food and water dish were in the same rooms in the new house as they were in the former house, I didn’t have to guess where my new owners would put my necessities of life.

So, although in both instances I had to experience change in my life, there was big difference. The first move created tremendous fear, uncertainty and self-doubt because everything was new and nothing was familiar. The second move, although the physical structure was new, all of my surroundings and things/people I was familiar with was the same. So it was no big deal.

However, for Skip there were significant changes he felt he had to make that made him feel very uncomfortable in the new home for awhile. He didn’t like the fact that there were no carpets anywhere in the house, all hard wood floors. He didn’t like the fact that the driveway where he parks his car is on the complete opposite side of the main entrance to the house. He didn’t like the fact that he and Anne have to juggle cars because their three cars have to be parked single file in the narrow driveway, creating a daily traffic coordination.

So despite the fact that this life change, that he agreed to and made a conscious decision to move forward with, created stress and anxiety for him for months as he adjusted to the new environment.

I’ve learned a lot about how change affects all of us in these last two moves. The best way to alleviate the stress of change is to ensure there is proper and thorough communication upfront so that everyone knows what to expect. Make the change as smooth as possible by maintaining as much common bonds to the previous environment as possible and make the change gradually so that the adjustment necessary can happen slowly.

So the next change initiative your business undertakes remember that rapid change combined with lack of communication regarding the change is not healthy for humans or cats.

A Feline Perspective on Business Success

Hi, my name is Sage, Skip & Anne’s cat.

 Skip has asked me to post here on things from my perspective. Hopefully, I’ll be able to add to the discourse on this blog and provide value to all you blog visitors.  If something I write here trips your trigger feel free to leave a comment. Looking forward to the dialogue, I’ll try and keep it non-controverisial as I don’t want Skip to fire me.

 

How do you prefer for it to “all” end?

This quote is for my new friend Linda, whom I met yesterday at a creative writing workshop, I saw this taped to the wall at a client’s office today…

“Life’’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out shouting - “Holy Sh-t, What a Ride!”

 

Decisions…Decisions

“It’s in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped!”

That quote is one of the most powerful quotes I’ve ever heard in terms of personal development. It is from Anthony Robbins. I quote it often in my coaching work, and it is more poignant than ever in the Breakthrough F.O.C.U.S. Coaching Program.

I’m 47 1/2 years old and when I think of the enormity of that quote, which is withoiut a doubt in my mind, reality for all of us, its pretty scary, isn’t it.  Look back on your life and business to all the decisions you’ve made and notice the track each decision took you on. 

I remember one very big decision that turned out to be one of the very best decisions of my life, even though it was part and parcel to, one of the worst decisions in my life. Both of which led me both directly and indirectly to where I am, and who I am today.

In the fall of 1988 I found myself parting ways with the team for which I held my first General Manager position in minor league baseball.  We had an ownership change and the new owner and I did not hit it off, so I decided to move on and figure out something else to do with my life.

I was getting married that December to a local girl in Greensboro, NC and decided after having lived in Greensboro for five years, that I liked the area and wanted to settle there after we were married.  So, I began looking for a non-baseball job locally.  I began going through the Prudential Life Insurance training.

Three weeks into the training, right around Playoff time in Major League Baseball, I got a call from the owner of the Tucson Toros, Class AAA baseball team, offering me outright the Assistant GM position. After thinking about it, I declined the offer (a lot of reasons went into it but mostly it was the fact that 1) I didn’t want to move 3000 miles away from my fiance as we were planning the wedding and immediately moving her 3000 miles away was a good idea, and 2) the GM of the team was a former Major League ballplayer and home town hero, and I would be doing all the work and he’d be getting all the credit).

I continued my Prudential Training. About 10 days later, this same owner called me again about a GM position for another team he owned in Columbia, SC, just 3 hours from Greensboro. I jumped at it and headed 3 hours south immediately.

That decision led me to the opportunity to eventually meet the owner for whom I would work for the final 12 years of my 20-year baseball career. He gave me opportunities I never would have had anywhere else in baseball, especially with my previous owner ifrom the team I joined Columbia, SC. I was able to obtain ownership in a franchse that started out with a value of $500,000 and eventually grew to over $2 million by the time I left baseball. It brought me the opportunity to fulfill the dream of every baseball operator, to start a team from scratch in a new market in a brand new stadium.

Where would I be today, and what would I be doing if I took that job in Tuscson, Arizona in 1988? I shudder to think about it. But, then again who knows? It may have led to even greater opportunities, probably not. And, that’s what I choose to believe, because right now, that’s my reality and it works for me.

In looking back at my life and career there are some other decisions that I knew at the time were defining moments and some that became defining moments after some time, I’ll leave those for another time. What about you what were some of your defining moment decisions that have shaped your destiny?

Next Page »